Crash: I got him on the knee!

Umpire: You missed him!

Crash: God damn It, Jack! He still ain’t touched the plate.

Umpire: Don’t bump me.

Crash: It was a cocksucking call!

Umpire: Did you call me a cocksucker?

Crash: No! I said It was a cock-sucking call and you can’t run me for that!

Umpire: You missed the tag!

Crash: You spit on me!

Umpire: I didn’t spit on you!

Crash: You’re in the wrong business, Jack—you’re Sears-Roebuck material!

Umpire: You’re close, Crash. You want me to run you? I’ll run you!

Crash: You want me to call you a cocksucker?!

Umpire: Try it! Go ahead. Call me a cocksucker!

Crash: Beg me!

Umpire: Call me a cocksucker and you’re outta here!

Crash: Beg me again!

Umpire: Call me a cocksucker and you’re outta here!

Crash: You’re a cocksucker.

Umpire: YOU’RE OUTTA HERE!

Radio Announcer: … I’ve never seen Crash so angry and frankly, Bull fans, he used a certain word that’s a “no-no” with Umpires …

Millie: Crash musta called the guy a cocksucker.

Annie: God, he’s so romantic …

—Bull Durham, 1988

Attention Gay Men:

What concessions would you require from us straights in order to keep the word “cocksucker” as a pejorative?

It’s a great word. We’re talking Grade A, blue chip stock. Awesome sound. Impressive lineage. I’d hate to give it up.

Fag is out, absolutely forbidden in polite society. Queer is repossessed. Homo is in retreat and gay is under strict surveillance. So it’s not like we haven’t made huge strides.

Feminists have been willing to do business with bitch. There are the usual restrictions on context, literal usage, etc.

But otherwise we’ve got a solid precedent for negotiation. Everything is on the table.

What say you?

“Preparations for a traditional filibuster can be very elaborate. Sometimes cots are brought into the hallways or cloakrooms for senators to sleep on. While in a filibuster the senator talking must remain in the same spot and is only allowed to filibuster twice in a legislative day. A legislative day lasts until the debate is adjourned, which can take days.

They used to call it ‘taking to the diaper,’ a phrase that referred to the preparation undertaken by a prudent senator before an extended filibuster. [Evil segregationist ass-face] Strom Thurmond visited a steam room before his filibuster in order to dehydrate himself so he could drink without urinating. An aide stood by in the cloakroom with a pail in case of emergency.”

This is an absurd way to govern.

You know what time it is?

It’s time to put up or shut up.

Enough with these “anonymous holds” and these “procedural filibusters”. You want to defy the will of the American people? Fine. Then Harry Reid should start handing out phonebooks. Let’s see how long these 60 year-olds can stand up.

scenes-from-my-hood:

this is a scene from my hood.  someone scrawled “bacon cocaine” on the base of a ‘no parking’ sign on bush street.

I used to turn my nose up at bacon chocolate, too. And then I tried some.

It’s amazing. So I’ll hold off judgement until I score a sample of this new bacon coke.

think4yourself:

Galileo’s 2 missing fingers and a tooth found - Science- msnbc.com

This is a very special object.

Like I said, atheists need relics too.

jlamere:

Most underappreciated actress in Hollywood.

Saying Meryl Streep is the most underappreciated actress in Hollywood is like saying The Beatles haven’t gotten enough good press.

More Lawrence O’Donnell, being a prick.

Everyone knows Lawrence O’Donnell, right? The teevee pundit who really should have his own show by now? The one who hosts Countdown better than Keith Olbermann? (Oh yes he does.)

You might have known he was an executive producer for The West Wing.

But did you know he played Jed Bartlet’s abusive father? The one who Mrs. Landingham called “a prick”.

I didn’t.

I Have A Dream speech

-Martin Luther King

filigree:

“I can’t honestly say he’s a Jihadist, but there’s a lot of things that are questionable,” Walters said. “The whole birth certificate controversy. From what I’ve read, there’s no proof Obama isn’t a Muslim. And I don’t believe there’s any racism [in the billboard]. I think that should be a question asked to any president who — they have some questionable backgrounds.”

I hate everyone, ever. (source)

This calls for a MadLibs Editorial™!

I can’t honestly say that this guy Walters blows truckers for pocket change behind the local KFC, but there’s a lot of things that are questionable. The whole Blowing Truckers controversy. From what I’ve read, there’s no proof Walters isn’t a cocksucking gigolo. And I don’t believe there’s any homophobia in that statement. I think that should be a question asked to anyone who — they have some questionable backgrounds.

Chuck Klostermann:

If you are the kind of person who talks about music too much, there are two words that undoubtedly play an integral role in your workaday lexicon: “overrated” and “underrated.” This is because those two sentiments pop up in 90 percent of all musical discussions.

What’s interesting about this phenomenon is that no one uses the same criteria when applying either of those terms.

Read More

“Not since ‘The Birth of a Nation’ has a mainstream movie demeaned the idea of black American life as much as ‘Precious,’ Full of brazenly racist clichés (Precious steals and eats an entire bucket of fried chicken), it is a sociological horror show.

Worse than Precious itself was the ordeal of watching it with an audience full of patronizing white folk at the New York Film Festival, then enduring its media hoodwink as a credible depiction of black American life. A scene such as the hippopotamus-like teenager climbing a K-2 incline of tenement stairs to present her newborn, incest-bred baby to her unhinged virago matriarch, might have been met howls of skeptical laughter at Harlem’s Magic Johnson theater.”

Jesus.

It’s written by Sapphire.
It’s directed by Lee Daniels.
It’s produced by Tyler Perry. 
It’s produced by Oprah freaking Winfrey.

Do the Obamas have to walk into the Rose Garden and say they enjoyed the movie? Do you need Coretta Scott King to climb out of the grave and give Precious two thumbs up?

What kind of a pedigree do you need in order to trust a narrative?

When The Color Purple debuted the African-american community collectively lost their shit. No one came within ten miles of a script with an African-american theme. Whoopi Goldberg says that for a decade the only black actors who could get a job in Hollywood were her and Eddie Murphy.

When is it going to be okay to make a movie about lower-class African-americans?