Unbranded; without a registered trademark.

 

While I was in the process of leaving my abusive ex-partner, I confided in my social worker (after asking at length about her confidentiality policy, which she assured me was full proof) that I had previously worked as a sex worker in a parlor. She agreed to leave this off my notes but informed that had I still been working at that time, she would have informed child protective services. When I asked why, since I was based away from my house and my children were looked after by family while I was at work, she said that “prostitution is usually indicative of other issues.” Later, speaking to a friend of mine at the brothel about this, she told me that her child had been removed from her care because her ex partner told child protective services about her job during a custody dispute. There did not need to be “other issues”; the assumption of other dysfunction and ignorance of the realities of sex work was enough that she lost her child to the state. Another friend of mine from the same parlor was threatened by her soon to be ex-husband with being outed if she obtained legal council during their separation. Rather than take the risk of losing her children and her family, she lost her house, financial stability, all her savings and everything she had worked for up to that point. Her ex-husband took everything.

TOO MUCH WISDOM.

HEAD HURTZ.

Did you see the one where the mullah tries to jivetalk the whore with some Manichean bullshit?

She jujutsus his Aesop routine and says, “I work by induction, fool.”

BREAKING: HUGH HEFNER IS A CREEPY OLD DUDE WHO KINDA EXPLOITS WOMEN.
 

Beforehand, all the girls were told to take a bath. ‘I got in, then another girl appeared from nowhere and jumped in with me,’ recalls Spaulding. ‘Then Hef stepped around the corner and took a photo of us naked in the bath together before disappearing. It was all very strange.
‘Another girl led me into Hef’s master bedroom. The only light was coming from two TVs on which adult films were showing. All the other girls were there, dressed like me in pink pyjamas.
‘If you kept your pyjama bottoms on, that was a sign that you didn’t want to have contact that night.’ According to Spaulding there were 12 girls there on that first night, and only she and another girl declined the offer to have sex with Hefner, who did not use a condom.
‘There was no protection and no testing for sexually transmitted diseases,’ she says.
Izabella St James, it seems, was much more open about having a physical relationship with him. ‘I wanted to see if this experienced King of Sexdom knew anything the rest of us did not,’ she recalls. ‘But he just lay there like a dead fish.
‘We often wondered why he did it at all. He must know deep down that it is just a show. But he is trying to live out this fantasy he has been selling to people since 1954. He wants to live up to the Playboy image he created and the expectations people have of him.’ ‘Hef looked absolutely furious, and one of the girls hissed at me that I was disappointing him. I didn’t care. Hef’s face was like thunder but I was left alone.’
Although still hoping to make Playboy centrefold, Jill Ann Spaulding was determined to resist becoming intimate with Hefner and quickly discovered the consequences when she returned to his room for another of the sex parties, keeping her pyjama bottoms determinedly on. The other girls soon made it clear that she was expected to take them off.
‘I was terrified. They were all looking at me, including Hef from the bed — just staring straight at me. I said firmly that I couldn’t join in.
‘Hef looked absolutely furious, and one of the girls hissed at me that I was disappointing him. I didn’t care. Hef’s face was like thunder but I was left alone.’
Spaulding was quickly dismissed from the Playboy mansion

BREAKING: HUGH HEFNER IS A CREEPY OLD DUDE WHO KINDA EXPLOITS WOMEN.

Beforehand, all the girls were told to take a bath. ‘I got in, then another girl appeared from nowhere and jumped in with me,’ recalls Spaulding. ‘Then Hef stepped around the corner and took a photo of us naked in the bath together before disappearing. It was all very strange.

‘Another girl led me into Hef’s master bedroom. The only light was coming from two TVs on which adult films were showing. All the other girls were there, dressed like me in pink pyjamas.

‘If you kept your pyjama bottoms on, that was a sign that you didn’t want to have contact that night.’ According to Spaulding there were 12 girls there on that first night, and only she and another girl declined the offer to have sex with Hefner, who did not use a condom.

‘There was no protection and no testing for sexually transmitted diseases,’ she says.

Izabella St James, it seems, was much more open about having a physical relationship with him. ‘I wanted to see if this experienced King of Sexdom knew anything the rest of us did not,’ she recalls. ‘But he just lay there like a dead fish.

‘We often wondered why he did it at all. He must know deep down that it is just a show. But he is trying to live out this fantasy he has been selling to people since 1954. He wants to live up to the Playboy image he created and the expectations people have of him.’ ‘Hef looked absolutely furious, and one of the girls hissed at me that I was disappointing him. I didn’t care. Hef’s face was like thunder but I was left alone.’

Although still hoping to make Playboy centrefold, Jill Ann Spaulding was determined to resist becoming intimate with Hefner and quickly discovered the consequences when she returned to his room for another of the sex parties, keeping her pyjama bottoms determinedly on. The other girls soon made it clear that she was expected to take them off.

‘I was terrified. They were all looking at me, including Hef from the bed — just staring straight at me. I said firmly that I couldn’t join in.

‘Hef looked absolutely furious, and one of the girls hissed at me that I was disappointing him. I didn’t care. Hef’s face was like thunder but I was left alone.’

Spaulding was quickly dismissed from the Playboy mansion

Squid pro quo:

Final section: sex work.  Okay I think I understand what  they’re trying to do.  This is supposed to be like sexy business woman  Barbie, right?  Chic urban New Yorker Barbie?  This looks like Up to her  Ears in Student Loans Dating a Man 25 Years Her Senior and Takes 5mg  Xanax Bars to Zone Out Enough to Get Through Obligation Sex Barbie.   That shit is dark.  I sent this picture last night to a trusted  colleague and he responded that he couldn’t get into this with me right  now because he totally wants to fuck that doll.  Exactly.

Read the rest.

Squid pro quo:

Final section: sex work.  Okay I think I understand what they’re trying to do.  This is supposed to be like sexy business woman Barbie, right?  Chic urban New Yorker Barbie?  This looks like Up to her Ears in Student Loans Dating a Man 25 Years Her Senior and Takes 5mg Xanax Bars to Zone Out Enough to Get Through Obligation Sex Barbie.  That shit is dark.  I sent this picture last night to a trusted colleague and he responded that he couldn’t get into this with me right now because he totally wants to fuck that doll.  Exactly.

Read the rest.

He tried to tell me, basically, that It’s Hard Out There for a Pimp.
"Be that as it may," I said, "it’d be a better world without the middlemen."

He tried to tell me, basically, that It’s Hard Out There for a Pimp.

"Be that as it may," I said, "it’d be a better world without the middlemen."

thepoliticalpartygirl:
So, it is my general understanding… That dudes are, for the most part, fond of blow jobs.
generic1:
Both sexes enjoy oral stimulation of their genitals. Your mileage may vary.
thepoliticalpartygirl:
And yet, and YET!  They degrade women who give them. Counterintuitive? 
generic1:
"Degrade" is a minefield of sexual politics. I’ll go there, but it will take all week. We can agree that a beejay is not as reciprocal as intercourse, yes? We can shake hands on the notion that there is an element of "servicing" to fellatio, right?
thepoliticalpartygirl:
Not in our society!  I mean, take this photo that you have to click through to see, because I don’t want it on my blog.  People laugh at a woman who (kinda sorta maybe?) looks like she is fellating an invisible penis (or three)!
generic1:
Yes! Sarah Palin is pantomiming a gang-bang! Funny!
thepoliticalpartygirl:
 By opening her mouth!  Shut up, woman.
generic1:
PROJECTING!
thepoliticalpartygirl:
Be seen, not heard.  
generic1:
AGAIN, PROJECTING.
thepoliticalpartygirl:
Because that’s all Sarah Palin is doing here — being heard, speaking to a crowd.
generic1:
Personally, I saw her fellating the three branches of American conservatism. We can go deeper into that subtext if you like.
thepoliticalpartygirl:
 Sure, it’s a crowd of jerks, and she’s probably saying hateful things, but that’s not the point — even though it should be — because LOLslut, right?
generic1:
I have no problem with sex work. Sasha Grey is honest and forthright in how she earns her living.  But I do have a problem with a person who cynically manipulates a political movement for profit. I think it’s funny when the two images are conflated. There are many kinds of prostitution.
thepoliticalpartygirl:
I know this is not a revelation; we all know this is how our culture rolls.  But that doesn’t make it any less frustrating, especially when I end up SIDING WITH SARAH PALIN who we all know is not exactly the best crusader for women’s rights.
generic1:
EXACTLY SO. Could there be any more potent image for fluffing up the patriarchy?
thepoliticalpartygirl:
Dear Straight Dudes,STOP MAKING ME DEFEND SARAH PALIN!  
generic1:
Stop hitting yourself, stop hitting yourself.
thepoliticalpartygirl:
And stop biting the hand that, um, “feeds” you? —-Humorless Bitch/PPG 
generic1:
Yes, but let’s be clear: the reason you’re humorless is not your feminismz. It’s your inability to see the inherent humor in a blow job. Here, let me help.

thepoliticalpartygirl:

So, it is my general understanding… That dudes are, for the most part, fond of blow jobs.

generic1:

Both sexes enjoy oral stimulation of their genitals. Your mileage may vary.

thepoliticalpartygirl:

And yet, and YET!  They degrade women who give them. Counterintuitive?

generic1:

"Degrade" is a minefield of sexual politics. I’ll go there, but it will take all week. We can agree that a beejay is not as reciprocal as intercourse, yes? We can shake hands on the notion that there is an element of "servicing" to fellatio, right?

thepoliticalpartygirl:

Not in our society!  I mean, take this photo that you have to click through to see, because I don’t want it on my blog.  People laugh at a woman who (kinda sorta maybe?) looks like she is fellating an invisible penis (or three)!

generic1:

Yes! Sarah Palin is pantomiming a gang-bang! Funny!

thepoliticalpartygirl:

 By opening her mouth!  Shut up, woman.

generic1:

PROJECTING!

thepoliticalpartygirl:

Be seen, not heard.  

generic1:

AGAIN, PROJECTING.

thepoliticalpartygirl:

Because that’s all Sarah Palin is doing here — being heard, speaking to a crowd.

generic1:

Personally, I saw her fellating the three branches of American conservatism. We can go deeper into that subtext if you like.

thepoliticalpartygirl:

 Sure, it’s a crowd of jerks, and she’s probably saying hateful things, but that’s not the point — even though it should be — because LOLslut, right?

generic1:

I have no problem with sex work. Sasha Grey is honest and forthright in how she earns her living.  But I do have a problem with a person who cynically manipulates a political movement for profit. I think it’s funny when the two images are conflated. There are many kinds of prostitution.

thepoliticalpartygirl:

I know this is not a revelation; we all know this is how our culture rolls.  But that doesn’t make it any less frustrating, especially when I end up SIDING WITH SARAH PALIN who we all know is not exactly the best crusader for women’s rights.

generic1:

EXACTLY SO. Could there be any more potent image for fluffing up the patriarchy?

thepoliticalpartygirl:

Dear Straight Dudes,
STOP MAKING ME DEFEND SARAH PALIN!  

generic1:

Stop hitting yourself, stop hitting yourself.

thepoliticalpartygirl:

And stop biting the hand that, um, “feeds” you? —-Humorless Bitch/PPG 

generic1:

Yes, but let’s be clear: the reason you’re humorless is not your feminismz. It’s your inability to see the inherent humor in a blow job. Here, let me help.

Felonious Vatican Fellows Linked to Gay Prostitution Ring

"One of Pope Benedict’s ushers and one of the Vatican’s choir members have been linked to a gay prostitution ring."

Because no one saw that coming.

My God, the shit I’ve done. Evil, foul things. “Scum” as I’m known in Reno.
Which is why I find this latest fatale heartening. She manifests a thing I would not stoop to. Odd to find myself scandalized. Even odder that it’s not from the sex, but the exploitation of the scandal. The rag on the right is disgusting, but the one on the left is worse by an order of magnitude.
Look at her. So brazen. The damage to the children is not enough. Mucking around in the wife’s humilation is not sufficient. No, she has to smile. As if at a car show.
OK! has paid her for having sex. There’s a word for that.

My God, the shit I’ve done. Evil, foul things. “Scum” as I’m known in Reno.

Which is why I find this latest fatale heartening. She manifests a thing I would not stoop to. Odd to find myself scandalized. Even odder that it’s not from the sex, but the exploitation of the scandal. The rag on the right is disgusting, but the one on the left is worse by an order of magnitude.

Look at her. So brazen. The damage to the children is not enough. Mucking around in the wife’s humilation is not sufficient. No, she has to smile. As if at a car show.

OK! has paid her for having sex. There’s a word for that.

Dear Ashley,

You. Jersey Shore.

Parallels. Discuss؟

Sincerely,

generic

Continued from thepoliticalpartygirl:
I am not certain what you are arguing or why you take issue with what I said …
Like I said, this part:
Ignoring a person’s right to say, “stop penetrating my body” is the most basic denial of humanity.
When you’re selling body penetration, this “denial of humanity” is anything but basic. Sexual interactions themselves are not basic; they’re irreducibly complex. And now we’re layering commerce on top of that? Please stop acting as if the issues surrounding the granting and withholding of consent during an act of prostitution are clear-cut and self-evident. They’re not.
Let’s drop the metaphors.
I agree that sex work resists analogy to other transactions, legal and illegal. It’s thorny stuff.
A person is having intercourse with a sex worker.  The sex worker says, “We are done.  Stop.”  At that point, the customer must stop.
Ugh. How can you not see that as murky? Your example is pretty one-dimensional. It’s also deliberately free of context. I’m not implying that either party abdicates responsibility during the act. But it’s not a manicure. We’re talking about very primal experiences. These are not moments of heightened control.
What comes after that, whether there is a refund or the sex worker offers a rain check, whatever, is all peripheral.
It’s not peripheral at all. I guess it’s peripheral if it’s empirically, objectively rape. And if we could always prove rape in all instances, then we might not be having this conversation. But that’s a fantasy world. What if the sex worker is making a bad faith transaction?
When a sex worker says “stop,” and the customer continues, it is indeed rape. That is what is being addressed here, or at least in the original quote and my original argument.
Example: The customer is in the moments just before orgasm. The sex worker says “stop”. The customer, for two seconds, does not. Under your definition, that person is a rapist, a sex offender indistinguishable from the man who breaks into your home and forcibly rapes as you were sleeping. I reject that equivalency, and your blanket statements about what constitutes rape.
Disclosure: I work in an urban medical clinic. I’ve helped run studies that have included many sex workers, usually women and gay men. The patient population includes many johns as well. I don’t want to mix this in with the horror of rape by law enforcement or pimps, but without getting too deep in the weeds, permit me to suggest that neither customer nor solicitor operate under Better Business Bureau guidelines. Prostitution is adversarial and exploitative, on both sides of the transaction.
If this is what we are discussing, I’m very uncomfortable with the assumption that there is an “ethically gray area”
Then maybe you’re not up to the heat in this particular kitchen. If legislating the permissibility of sex workers halting their customers in the middle of primal bodily functions isn’t ethically gray, I seriously don’t know what is.
(I will grant you the lack of legal infrastructure) when speaking about a sex worker’s right to say, “No.”
But that’s exactly the thing. Our legal infrastructure sucks. Our legal definition of rape is oversimple when it comes to prostitution. 1st, 2nd and 3rd degree sexual assault statutes make a lot more sense when applied to domestic violence, random sexual assault, date rape, etc. I’m not arguing that rape during sex work is of lesser or greater offense than rape outside of sex work, just that it’s … different, like how sexual assault isn’t less of a crime than statutory rape. But a judge has discretion over whether the 18 year-old is a “rapist” just by sleeping with his 17 year-old girlfriend.
poisonthemonkey:
There is no ethically grey area when it comes to rape.
There is an ethically grey area when it comes to determining if rape occurred. Hell, there’s an ethically grey area when it comes to taking of human life. That’s why we have judges and juries. If it was all black and white—if all that was required was simple application of the law, sentences would be meted out by disinterested public servants, like parking tickets.
No is no.
And A is A. Now let’s talk about the world we actually live in, yes?
No metaphor can hide the thick, stark line between consent and rape of a mentally capable person.
And no metaphor can clear it up either.

Continued from thepoliticalpartygirl:

I am not certain what you are arguing or why you take issue with what I said …

Like I said, this part:

Ignoring a person’s right to say, “stop penetrating my body” is the most basic denial of humanity.

When you’re selling body penetration, this “denial of humanity” is anything but basic. Sexual interactions themselves are not basic; they’re irreducibly complex. And now we’re layering commerce on top of that? Please stop acting as if the issues surrounding the granting and withholding of consent during an act of prostitution are clear-cut and self-evident. They’re not.

Let’s drop the metaphors.

I agree that sex work resists analogy to other transactions, legal and illegal. It’s thorny stuff.

A person is having intercourse with a sex worker.  The sex worker says, “We are done.  Stop.”  At that point, the customer must stop.

Ugh. How can you not see that as murky? Your example is pretty one-dimensional. It’s also deliberately free of context. I’m not implying that either party abdicates responsibility during the act. But it’s not a manicure. We’re talking about very primal experiences. These are not moments of heightened control.

What comes after that, whether there is a refund or the sex worker offers a rain check, whatever, is all peripheral.

It’s not peripheral at all. I guess it’s peripheral if it’s empirically, objectively rape. And if we could always prove rape in all instances, then we might not be having this conversation. But that’s a fantasy world. What if the sex worker is making a bad faith transaction?

When a sex worker says “stop,” and the customer continues, it is indeed rape. That is what is being addressed here, or at least in the original quote and my original argument.

Example: The customer is in the moments just before orgasm. The sex worker says “stop”. The customer, for two seconds, does not. Under your definition, that person is a rapist, a sex offender indistinguishable from the man who breaks into your home and forcibly rapes as you were sleeping. I reject that equivalency, and your blanket statements about what constitutes rape.

Disclosure: I work in an urban medical clinic. I’ve helped run studies that have included many sex workers, usually women and gay men. The patient population includes many johns as well. I don’t want to mix this in with the horror of rape by law enforcement or pimps, but without getting too deep in the weeds, permit me to suggest that neither customer nor solicitor operate under Better Business Bureau guidelines. Prostitution is adversarial and exploitative, on both sides of the transaction.

If this is what we are discussing, I’m very uncomfortable with the assumption that there is an “ethically gray area”

Then maybe you’re not up to the heat in this particular kitchen. If legislating the permissibility of sex workers halting their customers in the middle of primal bodily functions isn’t ethically gray, I seriously don’t know what is.

(I will grant you the lack of legal infrastructure) when speaking about a sex worker’s right to say, “No.”

But that’s exactly the thing. Our legal infrastructure sucks. Our legal definition of rape is oversimple when it comes to prostitution. 1st, 2nd and 3rd degree sexual assault statutes make a lot more sense when applied to domestic violence, random sexual assault, date rape, etc. I’m not arguing that rape during sex work is of lesser or greater offense than rape outside of sex work, just that it’s … different, like how sexual assault isn’t less of a crime than statutory rape. But a judge has discretion over whether the 18 year-old is a “rapist” just by sleeping with his 17 year-old girlfriend.

poisonthemonkey:

There is no ethically grey area when it comes to rape.

There is an ethically grey area when it comes to determining if rape occurred. Hell, there’s an ethically grey area when it comes to taking of human life. That’s why we have judges and juries. If it was all black and white—if all that was required was simple application of the law, sentences would be meted out by disinterested public servants, like parking tickets.

No is no.

And A is A. Now let’s talk about the world we actually live in, yes?

No metaphor can hide the thick, stark line between consent and rape of a mentally capable person.

And no metaphor can clear it up either.

There is a range of feminist opinion on what role sex work ought to have. But there can’t be a range of opinion on sex workers: they are people. No means no. Stop means stop. Whatever services they sell — cam shows, penetration, BDSM or whatever — do not and cannot be seen to invalidate their humanity. And ignoring a person’s right to say, “stop penetrating my body” is the most basic denial of humanity.

Sex Work Is Not An Invitation To Rape (via amberlrheasexismandthecity)

Yeah, but when one’s business model includes a green light to “start penetrating my body” there will be disputes. Just as with any other exchange of goods for services.

(via generic1)

Just because one gives a “green light,” it does not mean that light can never turn red.  As with any other exchange of services, the provider has a right to refuse service to a customer at any time. Does the customer have the right to demand a refund? Will there be disputes?  Of course. But if Macy’s decides to cancel my credit card, I don’t have the right to continue to purchase their products using that card.  When you’re talking about a service one provides with their body, the denial of that person’s right to quit work is akin to slavery, or in the case of sex work and the news story referred to in the quoted blog post: rape.

(via thepoliticalpartygirl)

Metaphor one: The light can turn red, the light can turn yellow, there can be a moving violation, there can be accidents where both parties are at fault. You see what I’m saying? It’s not all vehicular manslaughter.

Metaphor two: There can be denials of service, there can be refunds, there can be returns and exchanges, etc, etc. It’s not all theft.

I’m not disputing the particulars of the case. The guy is a rapist who likes hookers. I’m saying it’s an ethically gray area without much legal infrastructure. If the sex worker says “stop” in the middle of intercourse, is the customer still obliged to pay? Rape & slavery are very different crimes there’s been an effort to conflate the two in policy discussions on prostitution. It’s all very mucky and I’m uncomfortable with the assumption that it’s a black & white issue.